I loved to do anything hard. When I was 6-year-old, I liked to jump rope. I did harder and harder, I got the goal that I wanted. I loved to draw, then I am drawing all day long. I can't stand to lose in competition. Sometimes I gave up before I'm trying, I didn't try It seems like I could lose in first sight.
I got a good score in school, so I thought I can do anything. I can get anything I want. But that's not true. I didn't know what real life is. I thought I am doing great and I am a hard worker. But I realized I am not physically up to it. After that, I kept my self low. I was afraid that I might be sick. I didn't know how to get over this. I focused on my real happiness. Do I want money or others? Do I want success or family? Do I want more salary or vacation?
I had a clue about me, I prefer to make my own family than a career, I prefer to freedom in my time rather than a huge salary. We all have limited time. I had to choose one thing. I thought there is a time limit to having children. That's why I considered entrepreneurs. I didn't know about digital nomads or entrepreneurs before I quit my job. I had known there are people who can live in having 4 hours workweek. After I knew this, I start to read books, and I realized I have made useless efforts until now. I feel sad and upset. This was my fault and I don't want to make excuses for myself. I had blamed the social problem and my parents before, but it's all my fault. I am the only person who can change my life. I shouldn't blame anybody. I've decided to accept my own choices. I've decide to love myself. So I read, write, run today as well. Now I knew there is no change without making own move every day.
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